Friday, April 08, 2005

Don't mention the war

My dad helps companies to become more profitable, and sometimes I type up surveys he does of the employees. While the surveys are generally tedious (We need better communication... I don't get paid enough... same same same) there are always a few standouts. They fall into two categories: 1. the swearing/offensive kind, i.e. "My boss is a jackass and can eat shit" and 2. the revealing of abhorrent business practices, i.e. "If we don't have enough money the boss will pretend that we never received certain invoices and put them off until they threaten to sue us." Through typing thousands of surveys I have discovered that the favorite cliché of the disgruntled worker is: "Too many chiefs, not enough Indians."
I told husband about this last night.
Husband: That's really really, amazingly offensive.
Me: Yeah. [pause]. Well not really, I mean Indians had chiefs... so...
Husband: Are you kidding?
Husband: Too many Jews, not enough Indians???
Me: [horrified] Are you kidding? I said too many chiefs, not enough Indians!

So remember my friend who is Jewish and my alarm in almost saying "verboten" in front of her? Now I'm so self-conscious about it that inadvertently my stream-of-conscious is firing up all sorts of Holocaust-type commentary when talking with her. Today she mentioned how it my jacket was spring-like, and I almost started humming Springtime for Hitler. Nein!

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